Educated, thanks.

{Paris building & sky, taken by me}

So, I've just watched An Education (yes, a little late but better late than never). Wow. I have to say I'm a little like Jenny (the loving-Paris part) except for being exposed to art history and a good opportunity to study at Oxford. I do feel bad though because for one who loves Paris, I can't, for the life of me, make a full sentence correctly. Except, maybe, to tell you my name. Atrocious. This movie has taught me one thing; action means character. I stole it directly from the movie. That's what Jenny was told by her teacher and she was coming to realize what it meant. By not doing anything you were nobody. That is a little bit scary, no?

I have this complex (let's just call it that, shall we..) whereby I'm stuck in my degree so I feel that if I were to start doing other things, like learn French or actually cook every night (I watched a bit of Julie & Julia on TV yesterday), might just mess up the whole equilibrium of my "situation". I sound like a coward. Maybe I am admitting to myself that I am. Finally. So now I can do something about it. I have no idea where to start. Women are said to be good multitaskers. Where does that leave me? I may be the one of the biggest embarrassments of my sex. So many people are working while studying, but not me.

Yeah, I guess I'm in self-loathing mode. And no Happiness Project nor anything else can stop it. I'm gonna have to work through it by myself and by my own principles and rules.

Recently, I just read Steve Job's Commencement Address at Stanford University. And again I felt bad for myself. I wish I had read it in 2005 (on my birthday, no less!) and not 2011. I hate to talk about how I wish I did something else, but I can't help it. I hate to talk about how much I hate it. And I hate to talk about how it's no use looking back because it's ridiculous, really. I also hate it with a passion when people keep asking me what I am doing and when am I graduating or whether I was working. I'm just waiting to finish my degree and start to change my life. Oh, and I'm terrible with making new friends, absolutely terrible. I need to do something about that too.

Basically I'm having a shitty year so far. Though it's nothing external. Everything's mostly internal. Stupid feelings and thoughts cramming my head. I know it has something to do with it being my final year of uni, but I don't want it to affect my entire year. It is after all the year of the Rabbit and I'm one hopping bunny. It's said to be a good year for those born in the Rabbit year. I certainly hope so. NO. I know so.

p.s. Sorry this post turned out like this. Apologies.

Something to make up for this+lighten the mood: Blind Melon's No Rain. Guaranteed pick-me-up (who can resist the adorable bee girl?). Oh, and Happy Birthday to my lovely friend Shivz :)

peace+love

random two

I just can't get enough of this song.

But please, please listen to the original version here.

In other news, I've finally gotten my films developed and sadly, almost an entire film was overexposed so nothing came out. Now I have 16 photos, instead of 32. Oh yeah. But it's okay, now I know how to use my camera a little better. It's still so much fun. I need to buy more film soon. I'll post some good shots here soon (as soon as I get to scanning them..)

peace+love

I just love how this photo looks (after spending time editing it, of course). I want more.

scene
Originally uploaded by gaiaWild

That's Better

After a good talk with the boy, I'm feeling much better so right now all I'm going to do is live in the present. 

In other news, I just finished reading Super Sad True Love Story by Gary Shteyngart last night (due to my inability to fall asleep). It is...different. As the title suggests, there's not much mystery about how the book will end, but the interesting part is the journey towards the end of the book, for sure. It's set in the near future (first in Italy, then New York) and chronicles a 39-year-old man, Lenny who falls for a 20-something Korean-American girl, Eunice Park. This book is read through the diary entries of Lenny and the conversations (something like emails and chat sessions) of Eunice with various people. Yup, interesting.

Sadly, in the near future, the younger generation's intelligence level is at a disturbing level. They don't read books, at least not printed publications. Everything's digital, no one can live without the digital device Shteyngart refers to as an "apparat" (It has all your details in it, and can calculate a lot of things including your lifespan, finances, and believe it or not: f**kability. hilarious). It's funny but scary when the younger generation don't know how to spell common words and have not heard of most important literary works in the past. 

Besides a sad love story, there's also mayhem in the political side, what might (or could?) happen to America and probably the whole world. 

It was an enjoyable read definitely, because you just need to know what happens next.

{thanks to Jolynn for lending this to me xx}

Currently listening to: furniture's album. It's gonna be worth my money.

peace+love

What Have You Done Today

...to make you feel proud? Yes, that's the title of Heather Small's song whose video I've attached here. I've been told lately (or implied) that I'm better off doing something else other than playing the piano. Yep, that sucks and it also serves as a wake-up call. Dammit woman, buck the hell up. It definitely isn't looking too good but it's too late and I am trying/going to not waste my own time anymore. In the end, I'm the one who is going to lose if I don't do it right. I'm just cheating myself. Doing me wrong. And I think that's the worst because you won't have anyone to blame but yourself. 

After thinking a lot about everything that's happened so far in my life, (it's like you clicked an invisible repeat button when you opened this page..) I got a little depressed. The modern (and cooler) phrase for it is 'being in a funk'. This would probably be the best time to write a poem (laughs to self), to get things out, but unfortunately I can't take this as inspiration. 

What if I'm not piano-teacher material? What else can I do? I need to figure out a lot of things. It's definitely easier to stay in a 'funk' than take control and do what is necessary. I'm not ready to make a list of things I should try to achieve this year because I'm afraid I might just get depressed realizing that they might not be achievable. But I know I should. Soon.

I read this post and found out about The Happiness Project.

I guess I'll give it a go.

P.S: this song is awesome. Got it from watching Miranda (a hilarious BBC show)

Ah, Men

I could definitely date this guy.

Shorts, shirts, pants, shoes, socks, tattoos and all.

(hint hint)

Them Old Cotton Fields

[vanishing elephant]

Song of the day: Mogwai - Mexican Grand Prix

peace+love

and the winner is...

[source: here]

Me :)

I just won two tickets to see Whitest Boy Alive live, March 22nd - thanks to these guys!! Feels so good to win stuff (after failing to win tickets to Laneway last month, and missing Kings of Convenience last year). Yes, since I'm strapped for cash I try my luck at winning tickets instead. Who wouldn't? The last time I won anything was a pair of passes to Hanson's gig at Hard Rock Cafe. About 6 years ago.

Oh. Yes. This feels too good. And on March 25th, it's MGMT. OoOoH March is looking very fine indeed.

peace+love

Covers

OK, so the best cover I've heard so far is Jeff Buckley's version of Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen. And then I stumble upon this other cover.

I'm not saying Jose Gonzalez is better than Jeff Buckley, I'm just saying that I've found another musician who does good covers. Besides, it's Jeff Buckley. No one can outdo him. And Jose is singing a totally different song, so I'm not comparing. Just putting it out there. :)

peace+love

The Smartest Marketing Scheme (I think..)

So it was Valentine's Day. Nothing was planned as (not) expected. Anyway I should've posted this sooner so it'll be more relevant.

"It was love at first sight, at last sight, at ever and ever sight."

-Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov

I got that from this site Flavorwire that has a list of 30 Literary Quotes That Just Might Get You Laid. haha.

[take as much love as you need]

via here

peace+love

Another Joe That I Love.

[source]

Watch: Morgan and Destiny's Eleventeeth Date

"..'Twas a shiny bright earth-spin, the up-over was a sheeny cobaltic blue fest.."

"Destiny masticated her sugar stick (the layman's lollipop)..leaving Morgan haberdashed.."

The script (narrated) is just awesome. Witty, fresh, smart. Awesome.

Joseph Gordon-Levitt (or Joe, as preferred) is just a great guy. He's formed a sort of company and created a website, hitRECord.org. Please check it out. It gives many creative people out there an opportunity to get their works recognized and published and appreciated.

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If We Lived in an Ideal World

. . . I would be able to get this into my wardrobe:

Secret Squirrel's A/W 2011
[via DaydreamLily]

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The Art of Looking Back

{30 Jan 2011}

Every time I look back on my life, I always think about what it would have been like if I had done something different after high school. What if I had gone to college to do a Pre-U course, A-Levels, or simply continued working instead of going back to school right after the holidays. What if I did whatever I wanted to do? What if I had thought about how much I would regret my decisions today if I hadn't made the right ones then?

They always say, "No Regrets". "Don't look back with regret, look forward with hope and (what-have-you-that's-positive)".

Yes, I would love a big dose of that any time. But what if I can't help it? I'm only human. There's only so much I can 'erase' from my memory and not my life. Please don't get me wrong. I'm very fortunate to be studying music and being very close to graduating (this year). I've looked past the fact that many people (friends and family) my age as well as those younger than I am have already gotten their degrees and joined in the rat race. I guess I thought music would be enough. Right now, I'm left wanting so much more. Art. Literature. Writing. Business. Marketing. I miss doing math.

I hope the important people in my life understand if I end up doing something other than what I've studied for. Athough, I wouldn't if I were them.

Anyway, another awesome song of the 90s that I miss so much and that a local awesome radio station played recently:

Please watch the official video cos it's classic :)

peace+love

Images for Songs [Part One]

Take a listen to Paolo Nutini's Candy. I did, several times - back-to-back. This song conjured up such a good feeling in me that I decided to find images that I think would fit the mood or feel of the song perfectly. Here they are:

|image by Mary Robinson|

|image from kushkush|

|image by Eleanor Rask|

|image by Vishnu Rajan|

I think Paolo Nutini's voice is awesome, unique - especially for his time. It's so dreamy and just plain good. I need to get his albums soon because they're worth it.

peace+love

{24 Jan 2011}

Oscar Wilde's Lord Henry

{21 Jan 2011}

Yup I'm reading 3 books at a time. There's Anna Karenina, Man Gone Down, and The Picture of Dorian Gray. Sue me. So I was reading Dorian Gray today and I came across this part (I'm only in the second chapter, mind you) where Lord Henry is talking to Dorian Gray and messing up Dorian's mind in the process:

"...And beauty is a form of genius - higher, indeed, than genius, as it needs no explanation. It is (....) like sunlight, or springtime. It cannot be questioned. (.....) Ah! realize your youth while you have it. Don't squander the gold of your days, listening to the tedious, trying to improve the hopeless failure, or giving away your life to the ignorant, the common, and the vulgar. These are the sickly aims, the false ideals, of our age. Live! Live the wonderful life that is in you! "

I edited this excerpt because the original text is way longer (hence the dots in between sentences) and also I wanted to highlight the main point of his 'speech': Embrace your youth before it's too late. And this kind of stuff always hits me because I always have the feeling of not living my life to its fullest (yet).

|image from we love typography, via nevver|

peace+love

To keep me going

This short excerpt is exactly what I need to motivate myself to run. More than I am now.

"...This is going to be a good one. I have no internal organs, only gears, which drive steel-spring legs and suction feet that grip the road and release. I'm like some high-tech primordial machine."

-Man Gone Down by Michael Thomas.

Song stuck with me at the mo: Bruce Hornsby's The Way It Is.

peace+love

{21 Jan 2011}

hung up

{19 Jan 2011}

I am so hung up on this.

in other news: I'm seeing a little progress in one-third of my piece. And I have 3 to 4 more pieces to work on. Which I haven't started. And haven't found. Then again, it's still January..for another week..hmm.

peace+love

minor period of discrepancy

Oops. So I thought moving my blog to Wordpress would be a good idea. Now I realize that I prefer Blogger more. (yay for blogspots!)

Anyway, I did a few new posts over at my wordpress site and I think they should all be here too so you'll be seeing multiple posts on the same day for abit..

tooodles!

p.s: It's so good to be back here. I'm so sorry for forsaking you, o great Blogger.

peace+love